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What I've learned about being a Mother so far.

Camden is (finally) napping! So I am taking a moment of *me* time to write a little bit and reflect.
I had a friend the other day mention that she had heard life with a newborn was busy, but wondered what you do all day with a baby that little besides feed and change him. So I started to think about what being a mother to a newborn means, at least as far as almost three weeks of doing it has taught me [:
Here is what I have learned about my new life,
Being a mother to my newborn baby boy means:
 Putting him down for his morning cat-nap and getting excited about all I'm going to be able to get done. I will get to eat breakfast, straighten up a bit, and maybe today just maybe I'll make it to fully dressed before he cries.
It means occasionally hearing him cry at night and wondering maybe he will go back to sleep. Maybe I don't have to feed him JUST yet. 
It means sometimes struggling to stay awake while you breastfeed.
It means being spit up on, sometimes puked on, and sadly yes sometimes peed on.
It means that sometimes you have to clean their diaper in the middle of the night, or fully change their outfit because its soaked in pee all while they cry because they are cold and/or hungry but you know that it has to be done.
Sometimes it means opening his diaper and quickly closing it back up so he doesn't pee all over the room.
It means that when your house is clean and the baby is happy you sit down and feel like super woman.
Sometimes it means that you get frustrated and you feel bad that you could get frustrated and someone so little and so helpless.
But despite all of that, despite maybe not being able to spend an hour getting ready, despite having to change your shirt a couple times a day because of something he got on it, despite being needed pretty much 24/7 its so much more.
It means that regardless how much he cried or spit up or struggled to get rid of an air bubble that day I still stare at him when I put him down to sleep and wonder how I made something so cute.
It means that when he sleeps I still have to go check on him multiple times to make sure he's okay.
It means that when I was in pain and had to go to the doctor because of my placenta all I could think about was that Camden was with someone else and I might miss him take his first bottle. (I didn't!).
It means seeing his cheeks get a little chubby makes me both happy and sad. Happy because he's healthy, sad because he's growing too fast for me.
It means that even when I get up at 3am or 5am to feed him and I'm dead tired I still watch him eat and wonder how I got so blessed to be able to be what he needs.
It means that those little smiles, even if they ARE just gas, mean the world to me.
It means his wide eyed stare when I talk to him melts my heart.
It means that the two single mothers I know are now super women in my eyes. They have a hard job, and both are rock stars at it. 
It means that, yes, its an adjustment. And yes I do spend most of my day feeding and changing my little boy.
But at the end of the day, I wouldn't have it any other way.

Life with our baby boy

 

We've survived a week and ten days as parents! We are learning how to do this whole taking care of a newborn thing [:
It helps that Camden is such a good baby--especially in the sleeping department.
Last feeding was at 10:45 last night and he didn't wake up until almost 6am!! And then he went BACK to sleep after eating until 8:30. I was a spoiled momma last night. He usually sleeps well at night, he only wakes up once usually around 4:45ish but he's been sleeping in pretty late so we are working on getting him to want to sleep a little earlier and then he can wake up earlier in the morning! All in time though.
Its been a bit of a blur the last couple of weeks. One day Garth and I laughed about how life just didn't seem real we kind of felt out of it for a bit there.
Camden didn't do well with the pain med they gave me post labor (it made him quite drowsy) so he wasn't a good eater in the hospital--and as a consequence no one got to see and check his latch at the hospital. So he struggled to latch, and I struggled to learn how to do so. He was gaining weight well so I didn't worry, but I could tell something wasn't right so I decided to see a lactation consultant this week. I'm glad I did. Camden is a tongue thruster, and he comes to eat with his mouth in the shape of a little "o". He doesn't like to open wide he would rather suck like you would suck in a spaghetti noodle. So that has been my main stress is teaching him to re-latch and re-latch til we get it right without causing me too much pain! He eats for shorter amounts of time when he has a good latch so thats relieving. The small "o" latch he cuts off his supply of milk so he can eat for an hour and not be satisfied. So. WE are still working on that. Sometimes a feed goes so blissfully smooth and others we fight each other and he doesn't want to suck and I wonder why people breastfeed at all! BUT all in time right? The lactation consultant advised us to teach him to take a binky (he hates them) so that he will learn to stop thrusting his tongue. So we are working on the binky and I'm happy to report he's learning to like it a little better!
Today has been a great day. We got lots of sleep last night, Camden has eaten and latched like a champ all day and the house has been vacuumed, dusted, and lysoled! All with my Frank Sinatra in the background of course.. its the most normal I've felt in a little while!
I've even cleaned the bathroom this week! I'm pretty proud of myself..
Sometimes I feed Camden in the morning and I think OKAY he's taking his nap what should I do now? Eat? Get Ready? Clean? I always choose wrong. I either clean or get ready before I eat, so then by the time I sit down to eat he's crying and ready to eat again. I've got to learn to prioritize [:
I've yet to cook dinner--but let me defend myself.
Last night was the first night we haven't had a meal brought or left overs to eat. I fully intended to cook a delicious meal, but we had a bit of a surprise.
So I've been having a lot of pain post birth and I just assumed it was the stitches. But the pain started to get pretty bad and was more pressure than anything. Standing to change Camden's diaper was enough to make me hate life. My bleeding had picked up significantly and I tried contacting my doctor but he assured me it was normal and prescribed stronger pain meds. (which, I wasn't even taking the other ones--so I haven't even picked up that prescription). Anyways, last night, in the doctors words, I had my second birth. I stood up after feeding Camden and felt something large fall out of me (sorry gross I know). I yelled for Garth to get Camden and ran to the bathroom. You're supposed to go to the doctor if you pass a clot larger than a 50 cent piece, and I definitely did. MUCH bigger.
SO we got our neighbors to watch Camden (his first babysitters! I was soo sad) and we headed to the doctor. HENCE I didn't make dinner again [:
Turns out not all of my placenta came out after the birth. So that explains all of the pressure. My body has been fighting to get it out and it has kept my uterus from being able to fully contract.
So for the next two days I should heal up nicely--and if I don't I get to go in and have an ultra sound to look for more pieces of placenta. Yay. Nothing could ever be normal for Garth and I could it?
Anyways I'm feeling much better already. Standing isn't so painful, and I don't feel so worn out and nauseated so I'm hoping that thats all behind us.

Its been a fun first couple weeks for sure.  

Full of some milk drunk moments

 Lots of Time with Family

Many Funny Faces

His first football game 

The First Sponge Bath and First real Bath

 Notice his beautiful comb-over

 His blue and Orange for the broncos

He needed a new blue and orange outfit by game-time because he peed through the first one [:

His constant need to prove how strong he is and hold up his head. He does this for pretty long periods of time. 

and just being our happy beautiful baby boy.

 We read scriptures together during his morning feeding.
We read our first book together the other day while dad was working (he made it through probably 3 pages before sleeping)
He loves falling asleep in mom and dad's arms--we do our best to not spoil him.
He's okay with a binky so long as he can hold on to it while its in his mouth.
He likes to grunt when you finally give him what he wants. For example if its burping he wants as soon as you begin to burp him he will make a little "eh eh eh" sound and you know you've discovered what he wants, if he wants to eat he will make his little "eh eh eh" as soon as you start to get him in position--etc. He's cute. 
 I'm just enjoying life with my boy.
We are blessed to have our little Camden.